I have a difficult situation with my dad, that may or may not be needed acted upon.
My 70 year old dad has started lifting weights (barbells/dumbbells/machines) 2-3x per week for the past almost calendar year. He is in partial remission (diagnosed in 2019) for multiple myeloma, and has lost some muscle strength and muscle function since diagnosis and treatment.
He is consistent, which is great. I’m programming for him with a reasonable starting place based off his preferences and response to training.
Basically, he does not want to add weight to all exercises despite the sets being easier than when he first started. When I ask him why not, he says he’s good with not adding weight without clarifying why. I have attempted to ask the main reasons why, and how he came to that conclusion, etc. To no avail.
I don’t know if this is something that should be addressed considering he is lifting consistently, but I want him to become stronger over time and maintain his independent functioning (he consistently sits up out of a chair with use of his hands on his thighs). He wants to gain some upper body mass, maintain independent functioning, and become stronger.
I haven’t been able to gleam if he is worried about being injured or believes that maintaining his strength is good enough (which it very well could be enough).
Given your coaching experience with clients, are there ways you’ve approached this? On the other hand, maybe I should leave this be.
It is unusual to be completely unable to get to the bottom of someone’s reasoning in that kind of conversation, particularly if his stated goals involve gaining mass, strength, and function. It may be useful for him to have a conversation with someone else on this matter sometimes family members are less likely to listen to family members than an individual with “outside” expertise.
However, if we we were forced to proceed with no understanding of the person’s underlying concerns, options for progression involving each of the main programming variables include:
Explicitly programming their weights (or a small weight range) each session
Using a “double progression” method to build more confidence with a weight before adding load, for example a target of 4-6 reps x 3 sets at a given weight, and when all three sets can be completed to 6 reps at a given weight, increment up for the next session and aim for sets of 4, before working up again. You could also expand the target rep range to be even larger (e.g., 5-10 reps) and allow him to really work up the rep count further before making a small incremental change in weight.
Increasing the number of working sets at a given weight & rep target, as a way to progress training volume. If he finds this tedious or unpleasant, then it could be more straightforward to negotiate an increase in load over continuing to add more sets.
These are just a few ideas. As mentioned above, a consultation with one of our coaches (or someone you trust locally) could be worthwhile.
Echoing Austin’s notes here, but I am also wondering if this means that he has truly added no weight to any of his training in this year and also made no other changes to his training? Just checking to see if this is a situation where he is simply doing the same things over and over or if there is potentially some progress.
Part of my work is with a particular population that is fairly ambivalent about exercise and progress in training. I have found that small and recurring discussions on progressive overload have eventually been helpful. And at first, it can take some time because the repeated training MIGHT be enough for that individual for a bit longer than you might think. But then they do need change, and you can see it.
But we also talk quite a bit about growth and change from a larger vantage point- how does one grow and change in life? What has to happen, what has that been like in other areas of life? At this point in his life, he has undoubtedly experienced being challenged, uncomfortable, or working with some helpful stress in order to get something done. I try to help my clients see other areas of their lives where they have done something new, difficult, potentially a bit intimidating, or uncomfortable. When they are able to see how central pushing ourselves into just enough stress to actually spark growth and change can help, they value this in training as well.